The Bane of My Existence

I was born here in the United States, but I don't think English was my first language. In fact, I had to be "tested" until 5th grade for English comprehension. Despite my fluency in English since entering kindergarten, at the beginning of each academic year I mortifyingly received that "special" pass from the principal's office requesting I stop by the ESL classroom. No tests ever really took place, since I walked into the room chatting like there was no tomorrow, praying not to be singled out.

Still. It kind of haunts me.

via Glut with Guts Instagram

Especially now that I'm a writing professional/editing aficionado. (Minus this blog--sorry for all the spelling and grammar errors, editorial gods!) Less now than before, but I remember beginning college entering these writing classes and turning red in the face as I asked friends and classmates for explanations of phrases. Yes, those damn euphemisms Americans love so much.

Now days, I don't find myself embarrassed to ask others these questions about certain euphemisms. I think most people pick these up as they're young, hearing these "common" phrases from families and friends, hardly remembering when they learned these.

I'm starting to see now what a blessing it is I don't know many of these. Not only does this help me be an objective writer, but it creates some great memories. I remember learning what "powder my nose" actually means from a childhood friend's rather graceful mother as she excused herself, hearing an ex-boyfriend regaling stories of friends "three sheets to the wind" the night before, and an angry professor exclaiming to never "darken their door" again for their support of unfair practices. Had I already been indoctrinated to the meaning of these phrases, would these small memories within time still exist? Most likely not.

What about you, dear reader? Any interesting quirks you hated as a kid, but appreciate much more now?